At times I feel like a puppet on strings being pulled in so many directions. One string goes this way for work stuff, one string goes that way for life stuff, and then I have all these other strings tugging for my attention. I want less strings tugging at me and to feel more solid and grounded.
I feel like some of the little strings tugging on me are meaningless things that just bring temporary “feel goods”, but yet seem to rob me of my precious time. It is weird because I find that part of me wants to just let it all go, suck it up, and cut the strings–yet another part of me is holding onto the half-cut strings like they are a security blanket.
While at times I feel like I can be vulnerable with those around me, I still find myself putting up walls and only letting little of chunks of light from in me shine out through those walls. Why am I so afraid to love….be loved…let others in?!
I do know I am going to cut some strings and keep the things that keep me the happiest, grounded, and solid.